Tuesday, November 27, 2007

I'd like a refund, please."

Anyone who knows me can tell you - I don't return things! I hate the process. The waiting in line. The having to explain why you don't want the merchandise anymore. The way you feel like a second class citizen while they scrutinize the receipt and the merchandise - it's like you are trying to scam them or something. I just hate the entire process and so it is very rare that I return something.
TODAY - I want a to return something -
I WANT A REFUND!!!
I bought this items many years ago and I am willing to take the depreciation on it but I want to return it and get at least a partial refund. I was lied to about the quality of the item and it has slowly and continually disappointed me with its performance over the years!
I am tired of having to coddle it and baby it to get it to do
what it was designed to do in the first place.
It was suppose to be rock solid with peak performance.
It was suppose to provide a lifetime of security.
It was suppose to bring me joy and comfort.
It was suppose to be self sufficient and low maintenance!!!!

The only problem is I am not sure where the HUSBAND return line starts!!!

Sunday, November 11, 2007

These are Not MY Thighs!!!

I can't believe what happened to me this week.
6:30 a.m.
It was the usual Monday morning. I stumbled out of bed, let the dogs out, put my slippers on, brushed my teeth, ran a comb through my hair, grabbed the car keys and headed out the door to take my daughter to school. The same thing I have been doing every Monday for YEARS now. Nothing out of the ordinary - right?
7:30 a.m.
Then I came home, fixed a cup of tea and headed for my home office to get some work done.
8:30 a.m.
An hour later I headed for the bathroom where I usually change but this time I decided to be daring - that was my MISTAKE! I casually took off my PJ bottoms and came out from the toilet area to head into the bedroom to grab my pants - and that is when IT happened. As I walked half naked past the large mirror over the bathroom sink I saw IT!!! I was mortified!!! I did a double take, rubbed my eyes and then closed them tightly. Surely I was having a nightmare!!! How could this have happened - IT COULD NOT HAVE HAPPENED!!! It wasn't like this last night! How did my mothers thighs end up on my legs. After a few moments of horror, adjusting the light and checking several angles in the mirror I came to the sad realization - "I AM SLOWLY MORPHING INTO MY MOTHER!"
"Maybe with a little bit of luck and a hole lot of alcohol I can morph into my mother and my father. I'll be overweight but I'll be drunk so I won't care!"

Saturday, November 3, 2007

True Romance

Ladies, Ladies, Ladies,
I was lucky enough to be invited to a True Romance party by one of the neighbors I actively market my real estate business to. It was run much like the tupperware parties my mother used to drag me to when I was young. There were about twenty women (aged 20 to 55), there were snacks, drinks and polite conversation, the hostest, the games and the party gifts. Oh My! No it was not a tupperware party.
We got to taste, touch and play with all the lotions, potions and toys - oops! let me clarify that. When I say play with I mean, oh how do I get myself out of this one. It was strictly PG. Only our hands and the occassional shoulder touched the toys. But boy were they fascinating and oh my - how many of them there are.
I highly recomend attending one of these parties. Especially if you would like to spice up your love life. Dan and I are both glad I attended.
For more info on having your own True Romance party please visit Chasidy English

"Lady in the Rain"



This is an original acrylic on stretched canvas

My First Blog


I was born and raised in Phoenix, probably in lower class. No, for sure in lower class. Why is that so hard to admit?
Let's just say my childhood was unpleasant enough for me to have blocked most of it from my memory. I know what you are thinking - I could use some therapy. Trust me, I have had plenty of therapy and sometimes you just have to trust your mind - if it doesn't want to remember just let it be.
Needless to say my life has seen its share of ups and downs. People who know me well say I should write a book. But I think not!
It's not my life so much but the insanity that is my family and friends that intrigues people and I think it would be wrong to exploit their mental health issues. Maybe I should just set up a blog under a faux name ---- But this blog is for real and it is about me.
I am a self taught Artist living in Phoenix Arizona. Well, truth be told I am still learning how to paint, how to live and how to love.
I am the proud mother of five miniature pinschers, a tortoise and a stray cat. Oh yeah, I have two daughters and a step son too.
I am the treasurer for a local non-profit, the Phoenix Animal Care Coalition (PACC911). PACC911 unites the animal welfare community by putting together adoption events all around the valley, hosting an annual fundraiser (Bowl-A-Rama) and raising money for the Emergency Medical Fund. The E.M.F. provides grants to our partner rescue groups to help pay for emergency medical bills of animals in their care.
My husband and I are both fulltime Realtors - yes, the market has been ugly - yes, we are poor - once again! But true to my nature I try very hard to keep the faith and hold my head high. We only have one life to live whether we are poor or rich we just get one today so I try always to be as happy as I can.